GENDERCRATS | MILESTONES IN FEMINIST HISTORY

PIG Salutes Significant Milestones
In Feminist History

MILESTONE 1:

In the bad old days of relentless, patriarchal oppression...

Music videos are dominated by heavy metal bands that exploit the fair sex with the prancing and gyrating of scantily clad women.

Now, in this enlightened era of liberating, NO-NAD-inspired sensitivity...

Heavy metal dudes are long gone. Instead, we have scantily clad jailbait and barely-legal babes, alleged singers who do their prancing and gyrating out front, where we can get a better look at them.

MILESTONE 2:

In the bad old days of relentless, patriarchal oppression...

Television programming is saturated with shows glorifying violence, violence perpetrated by macho male heroes.

Now, in this enlightened era of liberating, NO-NAD-inspired sensitivity...

A bevy of butt-stomping hotties like Nikita, Xena, Calisto, Atalanta and Buffy give dudes all the kick-ass, booty-shaking action they can handle.

MILESTONE 3:

In the bad old days of relentless, patriarchal oppression...

Supermodels with Barbie Doll figures promote anorexia, by giving real women a bad body image.

Now, in this enlightened era of liberating, NO-NAD-inspired sensitivity...

These slinky, shapely stunners have their own cable network, allowing red-blooded dudes to watch these runway rompers play peek-a-booty 24/7!

MILESTONE 4:

In the bad old days of relentless, patriarchal oppression...

Women and their accomplishments are unappreciated because rape-promoting rags like Playboy and Penthouse victimize them.

Now, in this enlightened era of liberating, NO-NAD-inspired sensitivity...

Dudes, world-wide, are appreciating like crazy, thanks to the Internet, web cams, and certain enterprising, booty-baring babes, who let it all hang out in the comfort of their own homes.

MILESTONE 5:

In the bad old days of relentless, patriarchal oppression...

Tennis has an insane scoring system, players whose names we can't pronounce and women players who are egregiously slighted.

Now, in this enlightened era of liberating, NO-NAD-inspired sensitivity...

We manage Anna Kournikova with inspiring efficiency and we no longer give a rip what the damn score is.

MILESTONE 6:

In the bad old days of relentless, patriarchal oppression...

Unremittingly-sexist television shows like Baywatch objectify women.

Now, in this enlightened era of liberating, NO-NAD-inspired sensitivity...

We no longer need to fast forward past scenes of rescues and David what's his nuts, because Pam Anderson and her puffed up sweater puppies have their own show!

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