SCHOLASTIC ASSESSMENTS:
Striking Terror in The Hearts of Amerika's Education Establishment

Fact: Amerika's Compulsory Government Schools do not deliver the mandated product; educated individuals.

Fact: The University of California has discovered that a shocking percentage of incoming freshmen cannot pass basic math and English skills test.

Fact: Government schools no longer attempt to instill a basic education in their students. They're too busy ramming the latest politically correct theories down the students' throats.

To the Educational Establishment, the students are a necessary evil. Since the government pays them based on the student headcount, there is no incentive for them to reduce the number of students under their power. This headcount based financing stunt, compels Amerika's educational establishment to keep student headcount high, by any means necessary. Several widely supported government school 'improvements' impact a school's headcount:

• Home Schooling:
No matter how well educated they are, home schooled kids lower the head count.

• Vouchers:
Get a grip, vouchers are the Educrat's ultimate nightmare, because they lower the headcount, plus deduct money from a government's school's budget.

• Expel Rowdy Students:
Can't, it might lower the headcount.

• Force Failing Students to Repeat a Grade:
If schools hold them back, these alleged students might leave school and lower the headcount.

Headcount explains why Educrats oppose these - and many other - common sense Educrap policy changes. This bottom line obsession is the critical data when it comes to understanding our Educrats. Paraphrasing Bubba's 1992 campaign theme, we realize that: "It's the money, stupid."

Tragically the government has no quality control system attached to their headcount payments. Despite their fatally-flawed attempt to impose accountability via the No Child Left Behind edict, the government pays, no matter how miserably the Educational Establishment fails to teach a student or students. The implications of this educational quality control void are obvious. Educators have a free hand to implement every brainless notion that strikes their fancy. Social promotions? You bet, because Educrats don't give a flaming rip if Johnny, or Suzy can't read, write or compute. Now that their usefulness is ended - Ka Ching...$ - get them the hell out to make room for the next victims. Bilingual education? Si! All they care about is keeping Juan and Lupe in class - the headcount must be maintained. Their ability to function in English-speaking Amerika is so not the Educrats' problem.

The Educational Establishment's (dirty) laundry list is virtually endless, but the effect is all too evident: from coast to coast, graduates from government high schools fail basic skills tests in math and English. What, you must be wondering, can be done to bring the Educational Establishment under control? Arguably the most powerful political force in state-level politics - this is a fact of Mexifornia political life - Educrats 'own' the state legislature, so don't look for meaningful changes from Legicrats. Since Educrats control all sides of this debate...since they dictate a state's curriculum, state school financing and determine school testing criteria, the situation looks hopeless. Perhaps, but let's take a closer look anyway.

Now that we understand their bottom line obsession, we might have a weapon to use against them. Using the sovereign individual's ultimate political weapon - the voter initiative - we might give these Educrats a wake-up call by smacking them between the eyes with a financial two by four. We can't change the way they do things, but we can give them the proper incentive to make the changes themselves. How? Let the NEA red brigade graduate whomever they want, no matter how illiterate the graduating class. Our voter initiative would mandate that some independent group - The Reason Foundation, the Cato Institute or the Ayn Rand Institute - would devise an objective test that must be administered to every government school graduate. The government would be ordered to demand a refund from each school district, for every student that fails. Before you call me names remember one indisputable fact: the government is especially open to such suggestions...in an election year.

Government school financing's brave new world would be devastatingly simple to administer. The independent group administering the test would determine each failing student's actual education performance level: I.E. if the student performed at a 9th grade level, the school district would owe the government 3 years worth of per student, headcount payments. Independent accountants would calculate each school district's mandated refund, then deduct that amount from the school's next headcount funding cycle. It's quite possible - even likely - that many schools would owe so much that they'd receive no funds whatsoever, in a given financial cycle. Trust me, that would give them a wake-up call they won't soon forget.

A vigorously enforced refund/quality control program would be a win-win situation. If the Educational Establishment insists on graduating morons, we, the taxpayers will see a dramatic decrease in our spending for schools. If the Educational Establishment shapes up and starts to do their job, teaching basic skills, we would have a good start on a much better educated populace. Admittedly, that leaves the college mess to clean up, but that's another story.

– T.D. Treat